Some Funny Jokes
SardarJee in grocery Store
Mr. Jaswant singh went to a grocery stores collected the grocery and came to the
counter and person at the counter started preparing bill for the items.
Singh asked " Where is the fat ?"
The
person didn't understand what Singh was saying and said "Excuse me sir, FAT???"
Sardar : "Yes Fat, Give me the fat" Sardar started shouting and arguing with the
person and all people gathered and Manager of that grocery stores came there and
asked Sardar about the problem.
Then sardar said "Hey Manager look, I took a yogurt from your stores and it was
written 'FAT FREE' on that but this guy is not giving me the fat.
A Master Thief in London was giving a Coaching Class on Stealing and had students from all over the world.
The Indian happened to be a Sardar.
After
several grueling classes on Theory came the final and decisive class of all, a
practical demo.
The master took all his pupils to a house nearby in the darkness of night and
entered that.
But by
mistake he overturns a vase.
Owner : Who's that?
Master: Miaooow...
The owner is satisfied and goes back to sleep.
Mission accomplished.
The sardar is very impressed. Returning to Punjab, he decides to open a similar
class for his fellow sardars.
Does
so and follows the same schedule of theory classes.
Then he goes for the demo with his pupils.
Enters
the house of a rich sardar in darkness, and tells the other sardars,"
These are the various steps for stealing. You just observe.
"Firstly, he goes and
overturns a vase.
Owner : Koun Hai ? ( Who's that ? )
Sardar : Mai Billi . ( I am the cat.)
Owner : Oh, Billi ( Oh. Cat.) and goes back to sleep.
>> Sardarji is buying a TV.
>> "Do you have color TVs?" "Sure."
>> "Give me a green one, please."
>>
>> * * * * * *
>>
>> Sardarji calls Air India. "How long does it take
>> to
>> fly to Amritsar?" Just a sec," says the rep.
>> Thank you." says the Sardarji and hangs up.
>>
>> * * * * * *
>>
>> EMPLOYMENT..
>> Our sardarji was filling up an application form
>> for
>> a job. He promptly filled the columns titled
>> NAME,AGE,ADDRESS etc. Then he came to the column
>> "Salary Expected" : He was not sure as to what to
>> be filled there.
>> After much thought he wrote : Yes
>>
>>
>> * * * * * *
>>
>> A sardar goes into a store and sees a shiny
>> object.
>> He asks the clerk, "What is that shiny object?"
>> The clerk replies, "That is a thermos flask." The
>> sardar then asks,
>> "What does it do?" The clerk responds, "It keeps
>> hot things hot and
>> it
>> keeps cold things old." The sardar says, "I'll take
>> it!"
>>
>> The next day, he walks into work with his new
>> thermos. His
>> sardar boss sees him and asks, "What is that shiny
>> object with you?"
>> He said, "It's a thermos flask." The boss then says,
>> "What does it
>> do?" He replies, "It keeps hot things hot and cold
>> things cold." The
>> boss said, "Wow, what do you have in it?" The
>> sardar replies, "Two
>> cups of coffee and a coke."
>>
>> * * * * * *
>>
>> A Sardar took an answering machine home and fixed
>> it
>> Home somewhere in Rajasthan, but two days later
>> disconnected it
>> because he was getting complaints like "Saala
>> phone utha ke bolta hai
>> ghar
>> pe nahin hai"
>>
>> * * * * * *
>>
>> What will a Sardarji do after taking photocopies ?
>>
>> He will compare it with the original for spelling
>> mistakes !!
>>
>> * * * * * *
>>
>> What will a sardarji do if he wants an additional
>> white
>> sheet of paper ? (he already has one and he
>> wants one more..)
>> He takes a photcopy of the white paper !!!
>>
>> * * * * * *
>>
>>
>> Sardar went to the appliance store sale and found
>> a
>> bargain. "I would like to buy this small TV," he
>> told the salesman.
>> "Sorry, we don't sell to SARDARs," he replied. He
>> hurried home removed
>> his
>> turban and changed his hair style, and returned
>> to tell the salesman
>> "I
>> would like to buy this TV."
>> "Sorry, we don't sell to Sardars," Salesman
>> replied. "Damn, he
>> recognized me,"
>> he thought. he went for a complete disguise this
>> time, haircut and
>> new hair color, new outfit, big sunglasses, then
>> waited a few days
>> before he
>> again approached the salesman. "I would like to
>> buy this TV."
>> "Sorry, we don't sell to Sardars," he replied.
>> Frustrated, he exclaimed "How do you know I'm a
>> Sardar?"
>> "Because that's a microwave," he replied.
>>
>> * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
>>
>>
>> Why did 18 sardarjis go to a movie?
>> Because below 18 was not allowed.
>>
>> * * * * * *
>>
>> How do you measure a Sardar's intelligence?
>> Stick a tire pressure gauge in his ear
>>
>> * * * * * *
>>
>> What do you do when a Sardar throws a hand
>> grenade
>> at you?
>> Pull the pin and throw it back.
>>
>> * * * * * *
>>
>> What do you do when a Sardar throws a pin at you?
>>
>> Run like crazy....he's got a hand grenade in his
>> mouth.
>>
>> * * * * * *
>>
>> How do you make a Sardar laugh on Saturday?
>> Tell him a joke on Wednesday.
>>
>> * * * * * *
>>
>> What is the Sardar doing when he holds his hands
>> tightly over his ears?
>> Trying to hold on to a thought.
>>
>> * * * * * *
>>
>> Why do Sardars work seven days a week?
>> So you don't have to re-train them on Monday.
>>
>> * * * * * *
>>
>> Why can't Sardars make ice cubes?
>> They always forget the recipe.
>>
>> * * * * * *
>>
>> How did the Sardar try to kill the bird?
>> He threw it off a cliff.
>>
>> * * * * * *
>>
>> What do you call 10 Sardars standing ear to ear?
>> A wind tunnel.
>>
>> * * * * * *
>>
>> What do you see when you look into a Sardar's
>> eyes?
>> The back of his head.
>>
>> * * * * * *
>>
>> What do you call a sardar who drinks only beer?
>> Just-beer Singh ('T' silent!).
>>
>> * * * * * *
>>
>> What do you call a sardar who has only one drink?
>>
>> Just-one Singh. ('T' silent!).
>>
>>
>> * * * * * *
>>
>> Why does Sardar always smile during lightning
>> storms?
>> They think their picture is being taken.
>>
>> * * * * * *
>>
>> Why does Sardar have "TGIF" written on their
>> shoes?
>> Toes Go In First.
>>
>> * * * * * *
>>
>> How can you tell when Sardar sends you a fax?
>> It has a stamp on it.
>>
>> * * * * * *
>>
>> Why can't Sardar dial 911?
>> They can not find the eleven on the phone
>>
>> * * * * * *
>>
>> How do you get Sardar on the roof?
>> Tell him the drinks are on the house.
>>
>> * * * * * *
>>
>> "Oh, look at the dead bird."
>> Sardar looked skyward and said "Where, Where?
>>
>> * * * * * *